Eruption

[Eggman]

While large conglomerations of you folks to the north are immerced in various degrees of certifiable major distress, be assured all is not purely roses and high cotton here on Lookout Mountain. Upon approaching my water pressure tank in the basement of the old log cabin this morning, I noticed a fairly large, steadily enlarging puddle of water. Close examination revealed a steady, Biden like drip ozzing out from beneath the small quarter inch pipe that rises up from the main line below the pressure tank teminating at a regulator regulating the whole system. First unbreaking the circuit breaker, I checked the little vertical pipe for tightness upon which it disassociated itself entirely from the main line, followed by a fierce eruption from the main line, reminicent of Old Faithful on a good day. Dense spray rapidly filled the air, much of it directly in my face. It was reminicent of the similar affects a cherry bomb produces when exploding in a toilet (thus the reason for listing this under this artillery subheading). At 90 decibles, I called for my wife to quickly round up and attach a hose to the pressure tank faucet to facilitate draining same pressure tank while I took measures to impede the spray erupting from the water line. Employing the traditions imbued upon generations and generations of Dutch such as myself, I firmly placed a finger on the erupting hole, thus stopping the uncontroled liquid dead in its tracks, much the same as my grandfather and great-grandfather did in the old days when they bravely inserted their thumbs in leakey dikes while saving Holland. Meanwhile my wife completed draining the tank and dissipating the pressure. A trip to Lowes and a new 4" pipe soon brought everything back to normal.

[Ben Nevlezer]

Sounds like an Ironclad cook off!!!